Why we do what we do
What piqued my interest in the past was a TED talk from Tony Robbins with the title “Why we do what we do”. As many people know he is a good speaker and entertainer, although trough his talk I didn’t fully grasp or understand the whole speech and this bothered me a bit. So, I decided to create a post about his talk on TED. As the title of his speech implies it talks about our motivations, drives, desires and needs. The background idea is that emotions, human raw emotions, are the driving force of life. It also applies that the reason you failed something significant in your life, isn’t because you didn’t have enough resources. With resources he means money, education, talent, connections and so on, but you failed, because you didn’t have resourcefulness which are human emotions. He points out that those human emotions are the defining factor for success, the energy that keeps you constantly in motion. Interesting! In his talk he provides with some tangible examples that you can correlate with them. However, in the end of his speech he doesn’t completely finish and with his last words I couldn’t exactly extract the meanings. Also couple of his explanations are to metaphoric to understand to hole reassigns. For me the concept of success is based on this quote.
What would you say what is the ultimate super power a being could have in real life? The answer is DECISIONS, because decisions form your destiny, your journey. Decisions make what you are and each decision taken consciously or unconsciously contribute to your life. For example, the high school you pick, work you do, the partner that you have or haven’t chosen. If we go deeper which we will, and according to Tony’s speech, our decision are shaped with two invisible forces.
The two invisible forces
The first one works in the moment and is our physical, emotional state that we are in. It is the consequence of dynamical events. For instance, if somebody threatened you, you would be in a different state that in comparison if you would win a lottery and because of that you would took different decision. The second force works on a long-term period and represents the model of your world. It is this thought in your mind which tells what is or isn’t possible for you. Usually but not always the second force works in a situation where you have time, in a calm environment that aren’t affected by outside events. Moreover, these forces don’t work separately, but are intertwined and work hand on hand. The only question is by which of them are you the most affected in a given situation. The two invisible forces consist of three parts. The first group is our targets, desires and needs, the second is our map or our belief systems and the third is our fuel we pick, motivators. Here gets very interesting, because he presents something from general to specific with some structure to it. Okay then let’s get ready to rumble.
(Psychological) needs and desires
From Tony perspective we share all the same needs, but with different priorities which create different motivational interest and this tilts us in different destinies. According to the speech there all six needs or desires. I will enumurate each of desires and give an action that we take in order to fulfill them. The first four are the needs of the personality, but the last two are the needs of the soul, quite intriguing.
- Certainty: You have to be certain that you are save or at least comfortable in the things you are doing and it will not crumble or fall apart. We do this by possessing a certain skill, smoking, making fun of others, controlling something or someone or by believing that our government is there to help us.
- Uncertainty: You need suprise, variety, changes. This accomplished by living, because file is a constant flow of changes.
- Critical/Significance: We need the feeling to be important, special and unique. This we achieve by making more money, being more spiritual, stepping out if the crowd, pusting nude photos on social media and etc.
- Connection and love: Yes, we need it. We do it through friendship, intimacy, prayer, walking in nature…
- Growing: Apparently if you do not grow, you feel miserable. The reason for growing is to have something to give a value to and give something back to society which then leads to contribution. Contribution is the sixth human need.
- Contribution: This need is an obligation to the society that you gave back. “Contribution is something beyond themselves, because living is giving. Life is not about me, it’s about us.”
Belief, belief, belief my friend
These were the 6 needs. Next on list are the belief systems. The belief systems are more like your ideology in what you believe in. It corresponds to the second invisible force which we talk about. You have to decided which action suits best for needs. Being a rock star for the critical significance desire, being a mother to feel connected, loved and so on. Apparently, there are 6 beliefs. In this section Tony hasn’t elaborate them well and he didn’t explain it all in details. So, I can’t explain them better,
Emotion is energy in motion
The third piece of puzzle is emotions. The motivators, which help us keep going. Emotions can work for or against us. We can use emotions to change the quality of our life. The essential point here is to identify which emotion pops us at a giving situation, realize them, and choose the appropriate action. Happiness is a choice.
What is the takeaway?
“Explore and try to understand your needs, beliefs and emotions which are controlling you”. Only then will you better understand yourself and, consequently, achieve more. My invitation is this, take a pen and a paper, write down your desires which we have explained and your belief systems which do you believe in. After that, try to find some conclusions which describe you for good and worse. This could bring you step closer to yourself. Maybe show it to your friends and ask them about their opinion. This is for now.
Cheers out 🙂